The Couch Critic
The Couch Critic is your laid-back guide to movies and TV shows that deserve your attention—or maybe don’t. Nathan dives deep into storytelling, character development, and cinematic style with a sharp eye and a wry sense of humor. Whether it’s a blockbuster hit, a hidden gem, or a cult classic, Nathan’s relatable approach ensures every episode feels like a cozy chat with a friend who just happens to love film. Perfect for casual watchers and cinephiles alike, The Couch Critic brings thoughtful critique without the fluff. Grab your favorite snack, settle in, and let Nathan guide you through the world of screen entertainment.
The Couch Critic
Holy Holiday Letdown, Batman!
What happens when you combine Batman, Christmas, and Tim Burton's gothic sensibilities? The answer might disappoint you, as we discovered in our latest deep dive into Batman Returns (1992).
After welcoming back fan-favorite co-host Katy to the show, we examine this supposed Christmas classic featuring Michael Keaton, Michelle Pfeiffer, Danny DeVito, and Christopher Walken. While the star-studded cast initially promised greatness, the execution left much to be desired. Katy, watching for the first time, found herself wondering why Batman barely appears in his own movie, while Nathan's review was notably brief – he fell asleep halfway through!
We dissect the film's strengths (Danny DeVito's unrecognizable transformation as Penguin) and weaknesses (Christopher Walken's distractingly terrible wig, unconvincing fight scenes, and a general lack of heroism from Batman himself). Michelle Pfeiffer's iconic Catwoman performance receives mixed reviews, with praise for her action sequences but criticism for her pre-transformation character. Plus, did you know Pee-wee Herman actor Paul Rubens plays Penguin's father in a blink-and-you'll-miss-it cameo?
As a Christmas movie, Batman Returns scores a dismal 1.5/5, with its holiday elements feeling more like window dressing than meaningful story components. Is this truly the dark Christmas classic some claim it to be, or just an example of Tim Burton getting too much creative control? Listen and decide for yourself, then text us your guesses about our mysterious April movie pick!
On the couch. We're laughing, crying, feeling it all, breaking down the big screen, the hits and the flaws. Grab your seat, press play. Let's take the pic. Lights camera action. Episode of the Couch Critic.
Speaker 2:I'm your host, nathan, and on today's episode I'm very excited because it's not me again by myself, because, yeah, no one wants to hear just me, they want somebody with me, and that's somebody on this episode is one of my best friends. I kind of gave her a hard time the last time she was on the episode because I can't, but she's here now and it's my good, good, good, good, good best friend, katie. Hi, katie, how are you? Yay, I've Yay.
Speaker 3:I've missed you. I've missed you, and you know, we all know, that people listen. Only for me, so glad to be back.
Speaker 2:I mean I was telling Katie before we started recording that I noticed that my episode numbers go up slightly when she comes on the show. So I don't want to officially announce it yet because I don't know if it's like a sure can do thing. But I have, uh, reached out an olive branch of sorts and said please join me on this journey once, once again. So we'll see what happens in the future.
Speaker 3:I know katie's super busy, I'm super busy, so we gotta work our schedules out, yeah, but and it's probably going to take quite a bit of groveling, and so this will just be the start, the start of that. But also, you know, nate, speaking of you being being my bestie, we've known each other. We were just talking about how you came to visit chattanooga, you know, over 10 years ago. We need to make it happen again. Um, but I, I do want to say this movie that we're viewing today, I was so excited about and I was like, wow, this will be a great episode to hop back in on yeah, it's a great.
Speaker 2:It's a great episode to hop back on, back and on for you not so much for me and I'll tell you why when I introduce what this movie is. So this is a journey of christmas movies once again, and this movie, while it takes place during christmas, it's again one of those movies that I'm like, really, really, and that movie is batman returns, and batman returns stars michael keaton as batman, of course, danny devito as penguin, michelle pfeiffer as catwoman and christopher walken as max shrek.
Speaker 3:I thought you're gonna say as um albert einstein, but that's just what his hair look that's just what his wig yeah, that is what his hair looks like in the movie.
Speaker 2:But no, I, I okay, I won't talk like in the entire episode. But no, I, okay, I won't talk like in the entire episode. But before we move on to what we liked and didn't like and why this movie was interesting to watch for Christmas, here's a little bit of trivia. Burgess Meredith, who played the penguin in the original 1966 Batman TV show, was asked to play penguins father in this movie, but unfortunately he was not able to do so due to illness. But do you know who played penguin's father in this movie? Did you recognize who? This?
Speaker 3:was no, and it was for such a short amount of time. Who was it?
Speaker 2:I know you are, but what am I? Does that give you a clue?
Speaker 3:I said oh gosh, yes, but what's his name? Peewee herman that's pretty funny. He's got, I think, facial hair.
Speaker 2:So if that threw me, yeah, I has like a little bit of a mustache, which actually is funny, because in the show gotham he also plays penguin's father in that show and sadly he passed away I think it was last year. He was battling cancer and so, yeah, paul rubens was his real name. But yeah, paul rubens played him in this movie and also the show gotham. So let's dive right into our likes and dislikes. I'm gonna go ahead and just admit that on my side of this review episode it's going to be very short, because I fell asleep and I don't think it was because it was boring, because I remember at some point I probably watched this movie and I didn't enjoy it, because I do enjoy michael keaton, I think.
Speaker 2:Especially nowadays, I think michael keaton is very underrated. He is a very, very good actor. He was great when he played the vulture in the Spider-Man movies. He was great in the movie Founder, where he played the founder of McDonald's. A lot of his recent stuff has been really good 80s. He was in a lot of 80s cheesy kind of stuff. But then he played Batman and he was awesome in the first Batman and he was awesome in the first Batman and he was good in this one too. But I did fall asleep. So my only like I can really say is I think they casted the movie really well.
Speaker 3:OK, yeah, yeah, I second that yeah.
Speaker 2:I think Danny DeVito was creepy as the penguin you know, in the 1966 movie, very cartoony, very comic-esque. In this tim burton version, of course it's tim burton, so it was a lot more dark, gritty, creepy, just yeah, very well casted. Michelle pfeiffer's cat woman, of course, fantastic. And then, for some random reason, christopher Walken is in this. So, katie, what were some things that you liked?
Speaker 3:Because you stayed awake for the whole thing right, I did, but I, as soon as you said the name of our movie, my body yawned, so I didn't fall asleep. But I wasn't super thrilled, and actually at what? Very early in the movie I watched it with scott and he goes um can you fast forward on amazon prime? Or he was like asking if we could speed it up. He wanted, he listened to all his books on like double speed and he's like I, I wish I could speed up this movie a little bit and it was dragging um.
Speaker 3:But to start with our likes, I agree that the casting was exciting. Where I disagree is on the execution. Like christopher walken maybe it was just his horrible wig the whole time, I mean it was it. I laughed out loud when I saw it. I was like this cannot be. Like. I hope there was no nomination for any type of awards for costuming for this, because it was terrible and I because of that I couldn't take anything he said seriously. So like I didn't think it was like an underutilized christopher walken, I would argue michael keaton's batman was better in the flash movie last year than it was in this.
Speaker 3:He was not impressive to me at all and I don't know if it was his fault, like if it's just who he was in the movie, like the space he was given, but it was just kind of shmeh. And then again Michelle Pfeiffer, like knocked out of the ballpark to pick her, but when she's not Catwoman, I was not into it. And again, maybe it is all about script writing and it's not their fault, but she was not in any way believable to me as like the secretary, the bumbling secretary, like I just was not. It felt so cheesy and corny. And then of course she becomes batwoman. It's a little better. I mean, catwoman gets a little bit better. Um, but gosh nathan, it was kind of one where I was like surely this will be amazing, look at all these people in it. And it fell flat for me.
Speaker 2:And it wasn't amazing and don't call me Shirley, but speaking of Christopher Walken's wig, this movie was actually nominated for two Oscars, which is crazy to think about Best Effects, visual Effects and Best Makeup.
Speaker 3:Get out of here. There's no way.
Speaker 2:It did not win either of those awards.
Speaker 3:For sure, let me find out what year what movies came out. That year they probably were just like. There's only five movies that came out, so all five get nominations.
Speaker 2:Honestly, I'm looking right now at IMDb and, apparently, the BAFTA Awards. It was nominated for Best Makeup.
Speaker 3:I mean, Penguin was good.
Speaker 2:Felix Awards Best Costume Design and Makeup Okay it was fine. It was nominated for Best Makeup and and best costume in a lot, of, a lot of awards, but it did not win. I don't think it won. It did win best makeup in the saturn awards well, so somebody yeah and I think that I think honestly, like you said, I think that was mostly for the penguin, because they it danny devito is unrecognizable as the penguin.
Speaker 3:It's like one of those truly transformational roles for an actor and I think that's probably where the heavy hitting makeup they spent all their like oh crap, we forgot we have to give him a wig, we don't have time, we spent so much time making.
Speaker 2:Let's just uh, oh yeah, christopher walken's in this.
Speaker 3:You know what he's, christopher walk, I mean it looked they said it looks like something from like party city, like a halloween costume, but anyway I digress.
Speaker 2:It's not that important city. Way to way to all right plug a story that's closing business.
Speaker 3:Wow miss them um, okay, other things about this.
Speaker 3:so I was looking for, I told so I was looking forward. I told you that already I was so looking forward to this because it's so classic and I'd never seen Batman or Batman Returns, like you know, because this came out in 92. I was two years old but I'd never seen it and my son watches like Batwheels and the Batwheels version like of the car that is in the show is based on, I think this version Scott was telling me he actually got to see the Batmobile from this movie Like it came through his like hometown and he got to like see it. So I know it's so iconic. So I'm thinking this could be a knockout movie and the script writing was weird and awkward. It's been a while since I watched an action movie from like the early 90s, so awkward. It's been a while since I watched an action movie from the night from like the early 90s. So you know, not having that cgi stuff, some of it does seem so fake. The fighting is so subpar, like I'm sure a kung fu movie from the 60s would have had better fighting. So I don't think you could say it's just dated but like the fighting scenes with batman so unimpressive like so weird and choppy and blocky and felt fake.
Speaker 3:I have no, really no positives about this movie. I felt like batman wasn't even the hero, like tell me one heroic thing batman did. He didn't take down really any of the villains. He wasn't some big heroic thing and I know he's kind of the dark knight right he's. He's like sort a hero, but kind of not. I'm like he just came across as exactly what people say. He's just a rich guy with toys and he barely was helpful. Catwoman was sexy, of course, but even her thing was just weird and the fact she gets thrown out of a window and then cats lick her to life it reminded me why I don't then cats lick her to life. It reminded me why I don't like DC in comparison to Marvel, and I felt like I loved the other Batman. I loved the one that had Arnold Schwarzenegger as Ice.
Speaker 2:Wait, wait, wait, what you liked, that version.
Speaker 3:I loved that one.
Speaker 2:That was the one that at least it's because that's the one that I grew up with. No, no, no, no. Stop talking, do you? Do you realize right now that a lot of people who may be listening are like probably turning off the episode right now because you just said you liked the honor schwarzenegger as mr freeze, the?
Speaker 3:george clooney's batman was better than this one to me personally and again, I was. I'm not. I wasn't expecting that. This is my true, honest opinion and maybe it's because I just grew up like George Clooney when it was the very first Batman movie I watched. So, like you may be just unbiased because that's my introduction to Batman, but I just was so unimpressed and the storyline was weird and the penguins were were, everything was just weird and it totally felt like I was watching nightmare before christmas because it's tim burton and it's just this weird like darkness, darkness but also christmas, and I think it just was so tim burtony that it didn't feel like I was watching a superhero movie at all so, and you've said already that you you've never seen the first batman with michael keith correct?
Speaker 3:I haven't, and so I would like to go back. It does make me curious because I think when you make a second one, maybe it would not be as good. Also, I was doing some research and people did were making comments that tim burton because it went so well the first one that he sort of took more creative license and so it was a little more tim burtony. So maybe I would like the first one better, but this just doesn't have that like like I want there to be like batman and he's like did you wait, kicking butt, that's india.
Speaker 3:Did you just use the? Indiana jones theme song to say this I don't know if batman has a song, does he? You're right. You're right, you're right. And I do appreciate the bat symbol in the sky that's cool, and the visual of the batmobile it was just weird. Actually, the best scene to me in the whole movie was when catwoman licked Batman's face. That was my favorite scene.
Speaker 2:I think I was asleep.
Speaker 3:It was very sexy.
Speaker 2:Did you know that the part where she I guess she's in the mall or something and she whips all the mannequins' heads off, she did that in one take.
Speaker 3:It's impressive Go.
Speaker 2:Michelle Pfeiffer, I see you, girl.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that in one take, it's impressive. Go, michelle pfeiffer, I see you girl. Yeah, yeah, again, I I wouldn't say michelle pfeiffer did poor job overall. I didn't. I thought she did a poor job as the secretary, as cat woman. I thought she was incredible and of course I think you know again, I never see this movie, but I feel like she is such an icon from that. Just her in that little cat suit is a sex symbol from the 90s.
Speaker 2:I think maybe what she was probably trying to do is kind of like the Superman thing Before she becomes Catwoman she's this bumbling person and then when she becomes this alter ego of Catwoman, but she didn't really like you're saying, saying she didn't really pull it off that well. But again, I wouldn't know, because I fell asleep so I missed the entire movie, because I remember waking up and I told my wife later because randomly after this movie ended, you know, usually it starts something new after it and I woke up and the show chips was on. I don't know if you know what that show is, but it's about. It's like old school TV show about two cops and and I don't know why it chose to play that after Batman Returns, but it did so with that. Let us go ahead and review this thing. So as a Christmas movie, oh yeah, what would you rate? Batman Returns?
Speaker 3:Okay With, remind me, is five like elf, five is the best Okay.
Speaker 2:Like Charlie Brown Christmas. And one is what else did I get? I think I gave something else. I gave babe a one as a christmas movie, but I gave it a five because I think oh yeah, babe is not a christmas movie.
Speaker 3:I'm I'm gonna give this a 1.5 because there is. It's not like just set in wintertime, Like there's several Christmas references and reference and there's a Christmas tree and the lighting the Christmas tree and there's snow and Tim Burton's version of nightmare before Christmas.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm, I'm giving it, even though I fell asleep. I still can give it a rating for Christmas, because this could still be a Batman movie without Christmas in it. So I'm giving it a big old one out of five for my Christmas rating and because I fell asleep, I'm giving it a 3.5 out of five.
Speaker 3:That's generous.
Speaker 2:I think it is generous because, again, I do think at one point in my life I watched the entire thing and I actually did enjoy it. But I also I also agree with you, and I think it's because we're so spoiled with CGI, like you said earlier, and we're so spoiled with action packed superhero movies, that a superhero movie that's not so action packed is kind of story driven, kind of character driven. It can come off as draggy and something you can fall asleep to. So I think with that, that's why I give it a 3.5, because I still am like Michael Keaton's just so great and it's so bad.
Speaker 3:Here's I'm going to give it a 1.5, and here's why. Batman when you think about the characters that meant something in this movie, batman was one of the least like. He may have had less speaking roles than anyone else in the movie and less airtime. Him and alfred were in the movie almost the same amount. So if you're gonna make a movie called batman returns, I need you to really let him show up, and he did not so 1.5 so that is katie and i's thoughts on batman returns.
Speaker 2:We did not hold anything back, even though I was nice with my general rating. So that's that. So we are going to the month of April. I cannot believe that. The school year is almost over. It's almost time for summer. I can't wait. So what are we starting the month of April with? Well, let me give you my birthday.
Speaker 2:Oh, let me. Let me give you a little hint with a quote and, katie, if you know where this is from, don't say anything, because I want our listeners to send us some fan mail to try to guess. So you can go to our show notes and click that. Send us a text link and try to guess what is the first movie in april based on this quote right here. This is it, don't get scared. Now. What movie are we going to be reviewing for the first tuesday in april? Send us some fan mail to find out. Thank you for listening to the couch critic, where every movie gets its close-up it's not just a movie, it's a way of life.
Speaker 1:We'll watch it together, day or night, so settle in close and don't miss a flick. This is the moment For the couch critic.
